What Happened to My Relationship?

  • How to Disclose your Unwanted Sexual Behaviors to your Partner

    Each situation is different and so it is hard to tell a person exactly what to do to disclose to their partner. Here are a few suggestions that will help guide you. Just take these as “ideas” and do what you feel is best for your relationship.

  • What about the Spouse?

    When a spouse or partner discovers a secret life of unwanted sexual behaviors, there is an excruciating pain that is reported. The word that has come to describe this pain in recent research and literature is trauma.

  • Porn Burdens Your Partner Relationship

    When a person engages in unwanted sexual behaviors, it often starts out of curiosity and recreational use. But as the brain begins to experience the neurochemical rush that comes from it, it often starts to use this behavior to relieve the stresses of life. Soon a person finds they have “burdened” their sexuality with the responsibility for stress relief, boredom, celebration, anger, loneliness, and so forth. When this happens, not only do they report having put a burden on our own sexuality, but it can also on their partner and that sexual relationship.

  • Research: Effects of Porn on Relationships

    When one or both partners in a committed relationship are involved in “unwanted sexual behaviors,” especially when they “keep it a secret,” over time the relationship crumbles and is eventually destroyed. In our partner Module, we discuss some of the rapidly growing body of research that demonstrates just how devastating these behaviors can be.

  • Should I Tell My Wife I Have a Porn Problem?

    One of the most common questions we receive from those struggling with pornography addiction is: “Should I Tell My Wife I Have a Porn Problem?” A recent blog post on the Candeo website is along these lines and very common:

    “… admitting to my wife will be the hardest and how she will accept me. We are close to separation. Every time she asked me what was wrong I could not tell her. I have failed her and my self.”

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